Archive: The Fine and Right Education of the Young Doctor Benny

Yay. Last night at about 9:30pm I came down with what Benny had. I expelled my internal organs from every available orifice until about 4:00am. Today has been about drooping around like an old shoe. Perhaps tomorrow would be better. Thanks to Ahno, Benny colored eggs and we also have stuff ready to do the egg hunt tomorrow at church. Let joy be unconfined.

Oh and everything that has been puked on is either clean or in the washing machine at this moment. Four loads later.

I think (dare I say it?) the fountains have dried up. He's had nothing to eat or drink but (a lot of) water all day... so the nature of the eruptions has been more pleasant than it was earlier in the morning. But he's still been erupting with fair regularity. The best one (in my opinion!) was when Sadie was asleep Benny and I went up to take a shower, since both of us had been on the receiving end of a decent amount of vomiting throughout the day. Of course Sadie woke up just as we were getting dressed and Dan was on the phone so we came rushing downstairs half dressed to help Sadie not be sad. So I was in my underwear and Benny was naked, and I was bent over trying to get his underpants on in a big hurry, and he threw up all over me, down my back, down my side, down my leg, ALL OVER CLEAN HAPPY SHOWERED ME. And himself. And the clean underpants. So. That was a good guffaw. In a sort of "not at all funny" way.

Welp. Here is something you never want to hear your child say:

"Oh no! I slipped in someone's really slippery puking!"

Uhhhh.... yeah. That would be HIS really slippery puking. This morning at 5:30 am I heard in the monitor the following: "Oh I puked. MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He had not only puked in his bed, he had puked GALLONS into his bed and then apparently had made puke angels (thx dan) causing the puke to touch and infect every bit of fabric on the bed. NEAT. And this was after last night he had told me, about the de-cased pillows, which I had questioned, "Oh, I had to open those." So it not only got on the cases but directly on the pillows and he had digested approximately nothing from his supper the previous night. I mean I saw goldfish crackers that were still swimming. SO. Nice day we are having here today. He has puked approximately eleven times and always onto something that would have been very much better WITHOUT being puked on. Including Dad. Benny came in the office wanting to be held (now a code word for imminent puke) and since I was nursing Sadie, I said, "Daddy will hold you." Benny crawled up and straddled Dan's legs, put his forehead down on Dan's chest, and unloaded volumes of vomit onto the front of his shirt and down into his lap, soaking through everything and leaving a big dramatic oval of milky puke on his shirt, directly under the black and white binary code that reads "You are dumb." Ahhhhh WHERE WAS MY CAMERA!?

thebennyeel: What would you like to take to preschool for a snack today?
lostcheerio: glldfish
thebennyeel: Okay!
lostcheerio: red lit
thebennyeel: green light
lostcheerio: red ligth
thebennyeel: green light!
lostcheerio: red ligth
thebennyeel: PURPLE LIGHT!!!
lostcheerio: STOP
thebennyeel: Stop what?
lostcheerio: STOP TIPEING
thebennyeel: Why?
lostcheerio: huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu
lostcheerio: they are 7 boys

Benny was up at 4 am. That is, 4 am the new time. So actually in my mind 3 am. Shifting around and having vague needs and wants. At six am he finally revealed the the problem was actually "my tummy is empty and I need some supper." Uuuhhh. Wouldn't this have been a more convenient sensation at OH SAY SIX O'CLOCK LAST NIGHT WHEN I WAS TRYING TO FEED HIM CHICKEN AND ROTINI IN LOVELY CHEESE SAUCE? No. So, I made him some oatmeal, administered it, and came back downstairs to address some laundry issues... and here comes Benny stumping downstairs saying, "Is it morning yet Mommy? I want to type with you." Urgle. He's in no shape to go to preschool. But he's going.

The other day Benny said to me meditatively, "Mom, did you notice that popsicle rhymes with bicycle?" Hehehe.

In other news, apparently BBN just "bammed" into me and I didn't realize it. :) Here's the AIM:

thebennyeel: Hi Benny!
lostcheerio: nemo is noty
thebennyeel: What did Nemo do?
lostcheerio: bam in to you

HEHEHE.

Wow. Dan got Benny some new goggles and boy they work great. We've never had goggles that actually work. Dan and Sadie and Benny and I all got suited up and we alternated holding Sadie and swimming laps. Benny swam around underwater "like a ray" until he had deep grooves in his head from the goggles! It was hilarious! Dan had on goggles too, and with the two of them swimming around underwater -- I think Benny had the best time today that he's ever had swimming in his life. It was hilarious to watch too. A good time was had by all.

lostcheerio: pigys heer cows
thebennyeel: How do the cows sound?
lostcheerio: moo moo moo!
thebennyeel: Do the piggies like the cows sound?
lostcheerio: hens heer chicenes
thebennyeel: Chickens say, "BAWK BAWK BAWK!"
lostcheerio: chickens go bawk bawk bawk
thebennyeel: Hens say, "CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK!"
lostcheerio: roostrs go kokadodldo
thebennyeel: Daddies say, "AHOY AHOY AHOY!"
thebennyeel: What do Bennies say?
lostcheerio: hi hi hi
thebennyeel: What should we do in Sunday School today?
lostcheerio: we need too peant
thebennyeel: Is painting your best thing?
lostcheerio: do you wunt a popsicle
thebennyeel: No thank you. Do YOU want a popsicle?
lostcheerio: no thank you
thebennyeel: No popsicle for anybody?
lostcheerio: all the boys are good
thebennyeel: who are the boys?
lostcheerio: good
thebennyeel: What are their names?
lostcheerio: bee benny boyd henba
thebennyeel: I am so glad that the boys are good.
lostcheerio: i mad a blobloblo
thebennyeel: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
thebennyeel: YOU ARE FUNNY!
thebennyeel: I love you Benny!
lostcheerio: huhuhuhuhuhu
thebennyeel: You are crazy!
lostcheerio: chelicheli
thebennyeel: chilly chilly