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Saturday, January 10, 2004 ( 1:36 PM ) Lostcheerio The last few days I'm having the most massive milk craving. Like, I just want to drink bucket after bucket of milk. Dan just went to the store and brought home another gallon. Normally milk and I have a cool working relationship -- I know I'm supposed to drink some every day and I do, but it's not like I look forward to the excrutiating pleasure of it with drool pouring out my face. Now, I do. *shrug* As for contractions, I'm having them, not timing them, not thinking about them, I'm totally discouraged with trying to construct any sort of plot out of this mess, and I'm just too tired to deal with it. So - they come, they go, they come and go, and who cares. # ( 9:39 AM ) Lostcheerio Good morning to me. Lots of contractions during the night. Lots and lots of bloody show this morning -- like huge amounts. Wish I could sleep. This morning the heat pump is out downstairs and of course it's Saturday AM and in the middle of a cold snap -- OF COURSE! # Friday, January 09, 2004 ( 8:02 PM ) Lostcheerio If my uterus doesn't produce some sort of baby tonight I'm going to be really really mad at it. REALLY mad. I'm putting it on SERIOUS time out. # ( 5:33 PM ) Lostcheerio So, this goes on and on. Making supper. I called the midwife on the "non panic" number to ask what I should do about these five minute intervals where the contractions aren't making me cry or anything. Left a message. We're having steak and salad. Oh, here's another contraction. BULLY FOR ME. # ( 4:48 PM ) Lostcheerio 4.06 4.12 4.17 4.20 4.29 4.31 4.35 4.38 4.42 4.45 I'm getting up to go take a walk now. Just around the domicile, to see if I can get these stronger. # ( 4:05 PM ) Lostcheerio Took a shower. 3.31 3.37 3.41 3.47 3.53 4.00 # ( 2:41 PM ) Lostcheerio 2.16 2.21 2.26 # ( 2:15 PM ) Lostcheerio Back from the haircut. Paced around groaning and moaning while Ms. Cindy put the hurt on Benny's overgrown head. He looks cute as a button now, ready for anything. So, that's taken care of. Now back to timing contractions and trying to keep hope alive. # ( 12:51 PM ) Lostcheerio I must get Benny's hair cut before the inevitable 1000 shots of 'baby and brother' with him in hs absolutely untenable moptop but the contractions are like 5 apart WILL I BE ABLE TO DRIVE DOWN TWO BLOCKS TO THE SPA??? # ( 12:20 PM ) Lostcheerio 11.05 11.08 11.22 11.29 11.40 11.53 12.02 12.10 12.15 # ( 11:06 AM ) Lostcheerio Took a walk in the Virginia snowstorm with Benny. Pictures posted on his blog. Contractions are now as follows: 10.18 10.36 10.45 10.57 11.05 Who cares, it signifies nothing. # ( 8:55 AM ) Lostcheerio I just got an email from a spam address and the subject header was "Hello Brainless Lydia, Hello Brainless Lydia." That was creepy. HOW DID THEY KNOW? # ( 7:57 AM ) Lostcheerio  Some of you (and you know who you are) have been asking to see pictures of me at nine months, so you can see 'HOW HUGE' I really am. I think this picture shows the hugeness quite handily. If you're looking for compare/contrast to my pregnancy with Benny, here is a link to the pregnant-with-Christmas-tree picture from that little adventure. Enjoy the giantess! # ( 7:29 AM ) Lostcheerio No baby. But we have some bloody mucous today! HEY! LET'S HEAR IT FOR BLOODY MUCOUS!!!!! WHEE!!!!! # Thursday, January 08, 2004 ( 7:39 PM ) Lostcheerio Yeah, back from violin class, having seriously painful contractions and cramps. Stacey said this would happen, and that it might be more productive after the membrane-stripping thing. So we'll see. Taking a shower now. # ( 5:19 PM ) Lostcheerio BACK from the midwife. I'm 2 cm and 50% still and the baby is at -1 station, which is a slight downward movement from last week when it was at -2. I GUESS. Stacey the midwife stripped my membranes as much as she could, and said she'd do more on Monday when I have my next appointment. IF I AM STILL PREGNANT. Ha. Benny has violin class at 6 -- the last appointment of our heavily scheduled day. His haircut got bumped to tomorrow at 1:30. # Wednesday, January 07, 2004 ( 10:15 AM ) Lostcheerio Another example of pregnancy-related moronic behavior. I decided to make macaroni and cheese last night and I was standing in front of the stove with the box in one hand and a measuring cup in the other hand, and I was reading the box, REALLY INTENTLY, as I had started out looking for directions to make the stuff and ended up being very distracted by A) a "great suggestion!" recipe or B) the Kraft hotline or C) the pretty colors and couldn't FIND the directions or had forgotten they were even the object of my search OR HAD FALLEN INTO A COMA... WHO KNOWS. I don't know how much time I lost there, perhaps aliens came and abducted me and had time to brush me off and deliver me back. And finally my kind and faithful husband came up behind me and said, "Honey, what are you doing? Don't you just... you know... boil the noodles?" WELL DUH. OF COURSE YOU DO. To my credit I did NOT dissolve into a hysterical pool of tears and woe. *BEAM* # ( 10:08 AM ) Lostcheerio I made a hair appointment for tomorrow at 11:45. Therefore I will go into labor tonight so I can have overgrown mess hair for all the baby pictures. SO LET IT BE WRITTEN. SO LET IT BE DONE. Also my hair-cutter is going to do Benny's hair. We've talked about it extensively in the past and I think she can be counted upon not to shear him but to provide him with a better haircut than I can with the dull scissors at my command. Benny has said that the haircut "will NOT be fun" but I think he can be persuaded to be still given the proper stimulus AKA Gameboy. :) # ( 7:29 AM ) Lostcheerio Let's begin today with the chorus from our homeland's national anthem: Oh BULGADAVIA! The land of the whitest sheep Where the laborers never sleep And you can't get anything to eeeeaaaattttt..... HAIL TO THEE BULGADAVIA! HAIL! HAIL! HAIL! Ah, Bulgadavia. How often do my thoughts turn to your blasted heaths and your craggy peaks, nestled snug against the hostile and disrespectful shoulder of the neighboring (and industrialized (and therefore rich)) Montrokovia. Long may you export supermodels and inferior wool. Long may the sun shine weakly on your disruptive and dangerous labyrinth of pointless ravines (or juhtenyészet) and your completely harborless and inhospitable shore. Someday I may return to you, Bulgadavia. But prolly not. No baby yet. Going swimming with Benny this morning. Hope to do 47 laps and get some contractions going. But then, hope is a harsh mistress. # Tuesday, January 06, 2004 ( 4:43 PM ) Lostcheerio Hey Everybody! I had the baby! His name is Marcel Buttcake Dubois Netzer and I made him out of equal parts flour and salt, kneaded together with warm water, baked in the oven until hard as a knuckle! Yay! So, pregnancy over, that was SO EASY, I had nothing to worry about WHEW!!!!! I can even paint him! In fact, I can paint him a different color each day. Today, the color is... DESPAIR. *wan smile* # ( 7:46 AM ) Lostcheerio Speaking of bright spots, Benny has a handful of his Hot Wheels tracks bundled together with a rubber band. He marched into the office just now and said, "NOW WE SING TOGEDDER. THE SONG IS WE THREE ORIENTAL KINGS. GO MOMMY." And then stood there earnestly plucking the two little rubber bands around his tracks as we sang the song, and then said, "OKAY NOW THE SONG IS DONE. GO IN THE KITCHEN AND MAKE ME SOME WAFFLES. OKAY?" Hehehehe. :) # ( 7:44 AM ) Lostcheerio Before you ask, no baby is here yet. No, no baby. Not even any decent contractions since yesterday at about 4pm. So, my life stretches on in front of me, shrouded in a dreary miasma of pelvic pain, fatigue, snappishness, the occasional vomit, and of course long series of useless contractions. Grey, hopeless, with no baby toes to eat or pinch, no baby head to smell and coat with aromatic lotion, no baby armpit, no baby knee, nothing but bleak, half-assed, not-even-cold Virginia winter. NEAT. It's extremely fortunate that we have Benny, that's all I can say. Benny is the extreme bright spot in this dull unforgiving world. For Dan and me, all else is dross at the moment. I should be happy and thankful. The baby is warm, fed, happy, quiet, and safe from herds of marauding angry lizards and stoats and whatnot. It's portable. I can sleep at night, for the most part. In fact, last night I had a dream where I could take the baby out of my uterus, play with it, dress it, show it around, and then when it was ready to sleep I could pop it back in for the night. Wouldn't THAT be something? Anyway, my point is, it's not even my due date for five more days. NOT EVEN MY DUE DATE! So what is with all the whinging and croaking about baby coming etc. I've decided that while it would be unreasonable of me to whinge and croak while I'm still not at my due date, IF NOT FOR THE LONG LONG STRETCHES OF STRONG, TIMEABLE, EARNEST CONTRACTIONS. This is the thing -- you can't dangle labor and delivery in front of a woman in her final month of pregnancy and then retract it, dangle and retract, lather rinse repeat, for like A WEEK AND A HALF without causing her some level of impatience and frustration. Possibly even some level of homocidal rage and hollering-at-innocent-husband. Were it not for the contractions, I could cheerfully do this for another month. But I absolve myself of guilt for toe-tapping, considering the circumstances. No one's toe could keep still while their uterus was grinding away like an apple press... COULD THEY? No. So. Off to get Benny ready for preschool. # Monday, January 05, 2004 ( 1:57 PM ) Lostcheerio Benny is on the toilet: "Ouch! Ow ow ow!" "Benny are you okay?" "Yes, I'm just pushing the baby out!" "Okay!" "OW! OH I THINK I NEED TO PUSH THE BABY OUT OF THERE, OUT THERE, TO THERE." "Okay!" "Oh, you need to lie down to push the baby out! Of course!" *PUZZLEMENT* # ( 8:03 AM ) Lostcheerio So... about 10:00 last night the contractions kicked up, started coming about 10-15 minutes apart, and very intense, and then about midnight I was very tired, and the relief between contractions was very extreme and leading me to fall asleep (!!!!) and then I took a shower and went to bed. Periodically throughout the night one would wake me up or I got up to throw up once, but mostly I just laid there drowsing or timing them. So here I am again, a new day, and no baby, and isn't it all JUST SO SWELL. Today Benny needs a bigger violin and he has his violin lesson and should also go swimming. But when I stood up out of bed this morning I immediately got a big huge contraction. So WHAT am I supposed to do, one wonders. This is so untenable. # Sunday, January 04, 2004 ( 6:09 PM ) Lostcheerio Still going. Dan went to the store to get some things... I think he thinks this is it. I really hope it's it, I'm going to feel such a fool if these contractions go away again for two days. BLECH. # ( 5:19 PM ) Lostcheerio Getting into some rather serious contractions here, the kind that make me want to kneel down and rock and moan and kill my husband. # |
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