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Wednesday, January 14, 2004 ( 6:32 PM ) Lostcheerio We are home from the hospital. I haven't written up the birth story yet but I have posted three pages of pictures. Here are the first pictures we took of Sadie. Here are the pictures of Benny meeting Sadie for the first time. And here are the pictures I took this morning before we left the hospital. More later. BTW I'm going to change the name of this blog and the header and continue updating it to follow Sadie's development. It'll stay at the same address. Bit tired but I'm giving the top of Sadie's little noggin 10083 kisses just now and that is very satisfying. :) # Tuesday, January 13, 2004 ( 10:35 PM ) Lostcheerio Dan here. Midwife took several hours to remove miscellaneous cutlery only to reveal another whole layer of cutlery. After a few hours of walking and minimal cervical dilation, we opted for the artificial rupture of membranes, which promptly took our cervix from 4 - 5 cm. to 8+. Within 1 hour (12:20 AM), Sadie Grace Netzer was born, weighing in at 8 lbs. 14 oz. and 20 1/2" long. Both Mom and Sadie are doing great and should be home early Wednesday afternoon. # ( 6:49 AM ) Lostcheerio Truck packed. Leaving. Please take knives out of uterus. Bye. # ( 6:30 AM ) Lostcheerio Called midwife. Called Andrea. Getting Dan up. Getting Benny up. Got to get this show on the road, big time. Midwife said come right in. So here I go. # ( 6:01 AM ) Lostcheerio 5.25 5.30 5.34 5.40 5.44 5.49 5.53 Going to go lie down on the sofa for a while and try to forget my troubles. There's no way I'm going to the hospital before Benny wakes up, I don't want to wake him up and drag him anyplace, etc. so I will try to lie down and relax and forget the whole thing for an hour or two. # ( 5:40 AM ) Lostcheerio Oh dear. Dumb David has a web site too: Here it is right here. Do not miss his special skills. Contractions getting a bit on the wild side. I wish someone would wake up so I could call them and consult. # ( 5:24 AM ) Lostcheerio Hey Joshilyn, here's a link to the "No Sweat Glands" web site. http://www.anthonycalandra.com/ Apparently his motto is to live life to the fullest every day, and have no regrets. Another highlight of his bio is when he says, "These puppies are soooo cute" and I am not kidding. Wow, are they so so so so totally cute!?!? Y'know, I am starting to think you're right, and she *is* going to pick him. I have but one remaining question before I fall on my own remote control -- why did he feel so moved to point out IMMEDIATELY that he had no sweat glands? I know people that can't sweat, it's not the first thing they mention when they shake your hand. IIRC, this guy was like, "Hi I'm Tony and I have no sweat glands. And I'm an artist or something, or maybe not. But the no-sweat-glands thing I'm positive is true. Pick me." Wow, being in labor makes me mean. SPeaking of labor, here's my contraction schedule recently: 4.52 4.57 5.02 5.07 5.10 5.14 5.18 5.22 Seems promising. Don't trust it though. # ( 5:09 AM ) Lostcheerio Since I'm not doing anything much except contracting and waiting for the sun to come up and wondering if This Is It, I'll share my thoughts on Average Joe Hawaii. There were several moments in the show last night which made me try to gouge my eyes out with my fingernails as I writhed on the floor begging Dan to CHANGE CHANGE THE CHANNEL OH PLEASE MAKE IT STOP. 1. Dumb David Serenades Larissa Note to men: Unless you are over the age of 80 and have that "endearing old man" ambience, and unless you are planning a very SHORT EXCERPT from a very old song, DO NOT EVER sing to a woman in a romantic setting. Do not say, "Serenading a woman is my secret weapon." Do not lean in toward her, trying to capture her with your eyes, making your lips jut out yearningly, your whole 98-pound frame popping with sincerity, down to your unnaturally long and strange fingers. Especially do not do this if you are Dumb David and have inexplicably awful glasses, hair like Shirley Temple, and rabbit teeth. Thank you. Goodbye. I don't think there's ever been a worse moment in reality television (and I've seen a lot of bad moments, thank you very much) and that's including the moment directly after, when Dumb David went in for a kiss with his wet, quavering, rabbit mouth and Larissa ACTUALLY PRETENDED NOT TO RECOIL WITH HORROR and their lips actually met for like .2 seconds before she scrambled away to gargle with clorox and wire-brush her teeth. BLEEEAAARRRGHH. Why didn't she eliminate David last night? It's my personal feeling that she's got a younger brother with "emotional problems" or some sort of "congenital brain dysfunction" or "psychotic tendencies" or "bad hair" and therefore David makes her feel LESS uncomfortable than some of the other clumps of hectic ganglion that NBC has found for her to date. 2. "I Have No Sweat Glands" Paints "Evil Troll Larissa" Note to men: If you are an artist and if you are going to go on a date with an artist and if you are going to paint each other's portraits with your little easels facing each other all cute, DO NOT PAINT THE WOMAN AS FRANKENWEENIE. As she paints a tender and sensitive portrait of your no-sweat-gland-having skin-tone-of-a-blanched-olive i-do-creative-beards skull, do NOT paint her with cheekbones like swords, eyes like frozen mackerel, and broomstick hair. I mean TRY not to!!! This is NOT the time to channel Picasso. This is a time to make her look, OH I DON'T KNOW, pretty? She's a beautiful, beautiful girl -- does your "ART" really compel you to re-imagine her as the troll under the bridge? Yoicks. I was surprised she didn't knock him in the head when she saw it, rather than go outside and actually CONSENT to kissing him more than once. Yeeeeesh. And a big thank-you to the producers/editors for putting another shot of Dumb David's big "serenade" after the credits. Just when I thought it was safe to look back at the television for "scenes from next week" I have his big honking face sucking up the screen, caroling tunelessly about I CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE. Hand me the salad forks -- I have some eyes I don't need anymore. # ( 4:39 AM ) Lostcheerio PS Yes, I took some Zofran. :) # ( 4:36 AM ) Lostcheerio Hi it's 4:30am, and I don't have my glasses on so I'm just going to type this. I woke up at 3:25 with a massive contraction, then another at 3:45 and another at 4:00 and at that point I found it necessary to get up and go in the bathroom and vomit and have diarrhea in what may be called EXCESS. Now, those who know me well know that if you want to know what's going on with ME, you have to check and see if I've totally lost control of my digestive system. If yes, then yes, there's something going on. So, after that I took a shower, then found it necessary to come down and fold some laundry, load the dishwasher, and empty all the trash upstairs. Developing... :) # Monday, January 12, 2004 ( 3:14 PM ) Lostcheerio OKAY! I just got back from the beautiful friendly helpful darling midwife. She said I am 4-5 cm and when she tries she can stretch me out "as far as I want to." She said the cervix is lovely and soft and thin and she had me bear down once and said the baby is RIGHT THERE. She stripped the membranes further (or again) and this time it didn't even hurt that much. SO. She said I would start having contractions after the membrane-stripping (which I did, and am, and golly, they hurt) and that when they are less than 10 minutes apart and hurt as bad as "hard period cramps" then I should call them, and go in. SO. She said if I am still pregnant in 12 hours she will be shocked. DARE I HAVE AN IOTA OF HOPE HERE? DARE I HOPE I WILL BE SNIFFING MY LITTLE BABY'S SOFT LITTLE SQUISHED HEAD BEFORE TOMORROW? EH? DARE I? # Sunday, January 11, 2004 ( 5:42 PM ) Lostcheerio Today is my due date. No one in my womb seems to care. The person in my womb seems determined to treat this day as a day like any other. Harrumph. # |
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